hot people Archive

Damn! Look at the fish I caught!

July 20th, 2008

This update is dedicated to all the great findings here in the last days of my residency.

My new fishing buddy Aaron is perhaps the youngest living male in the City of Englewood at the ripe age of 27. Too bad I’m married huh? This is the snook he caught this morning. Because they are protected (spawning season), he threw it back.

Here’s a snapper we caught! A bit small but still good to eat! It was the first fish that I have eaten straight from the water. I don’t know why Aaron’s shorts look like they are falling down like that in this picture. I don’t remember them doing that in real life. (Oh the mockery of this cat lady. Oh the mockery.)

But boy, do I love having all these adventures with my wife! She’s so much fun!

But it was no easy task to clean a fish! Yuck! Check out this video of him cleaning the fish…. That thing wouldn’t die!

Before cooking….

After! The snapper was actually very small and very bony. So we got all of two bites of fish in each filet.

I’m still kinda crap as a fisherwoman. My new show, CAT LADY that premieres next week uses a lot of fishing (a great way to excuse all this leisure time as “research”). Here is some once live bait I used that got a huge bite on it’s side. I’m all bait and no bite I tell you.

We also got a great full moon sunset out here where the tide was so low that sand dunes appeared. Places where the water normally goes to your waist or higher, you could walk right through.

Watch as I narrate the sunset. On full moon nights there is a rare burst of green light that appears when the sun goes down. You can’t see it in the video but it’s still gorgeous to take in everything else you can get from the video.

See how low the water gets?

I thought this was a good picture of Sonja doing what she does best. Photography!

Later that full moon night we went looking for sea turtles laying eggs. We thought it best to split up and each patrol in a different direction. I saw two fresh sea turtle nests and Sonja saw one. But we didn’t see the turtles. It’s nuts because they lay eggs in holes that they make at least 18 inches deep and then they cover them before going back to the water. So they must have worked fast because we totally missed them. I think I saw a turtle as she was leaving the nest she made. I think I saw her back as she disappeared in the tide.

This is what a fresh sea turtle nest looks like! You can see two sets of tracks (one going from the water, and one going back to the water). The little mound is where the turtle dug, laid, and buried her eggs.

In the morning, Sonja and I woke up super early to watch the sea turtle patrol dig up nests that were past gestation. The patrol is made up of cool volunteers who dig up nests, then count the numbers of non-viable eggs and hatched eggs. They also keep track and protect the area around new eggs. Sometimes they find live or dead baby turtles in the nests they dig up.

Here are the eggs they dug up. A lot were not good, but the ones that still might hatch are reburied closer to the surface where they will get more heat and the babies will have an easier time digging their way out.

When a new nest is discovered by the patrol, the nest is marked by a stake that records the nest number, date of laying, and the initials of the people patrolling. This is the nest Sonja found the night before. The “KW” is yours truly!

Here are two geckos, mocking me with their lovemaking.

Here is a video I made of them. It’s not very clever. And moves as much as the above photo. Gecko penises are red btw.

Sonja knows how to handle my camera better than me. Here I am in the gulf with the Hermitage House behind me. Today the water was so clear we could see our feet at the bottom.

I also have made a lot of crafts while here. The local wildlife has inspired a lot of new animal shapes.

If my fishing skills suck, at least I can improvise!

Here is a dead mouse I’m using in Cat Lady.

And of course! Sea turtles! If I can’t spot them live, I can at least make them. This is for the woman who nominated me to come here.

Come on, you know you want to see another sunset photo! It feels like every sunset is so different here.

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Category: artist life., cat lady, cat pee, crafty, hot people, i'm kristina wong, oh my god, rednecks, road wong, sex is unnecessary when you have yarn., the secret, vision

I’m ucked again

July 3rd, 2008

Letter down! Letter down!

argh! I was so excited because it looked like my f key (i had to cut and paste that “f”) was as easy to ix as a squirt o air rom these computer guys in Sarasota who ixed it ree o charge by just cleaning under the key. But screwed again because I was here typing and it went out again.

Anyway. I think the ghost is back. The fan is shaking in a creepy way. And weird things tend to turn on when they shouldn’t. But I don’t care anymore about being spooked in the house alone. I just want my f back. I also bought a can o RAID which makes me eel saer to walk around with.

Looks like I may have to pay $80-$150 to get a new keyboard and scream “UCK YOU!” to all my bloggers in ull orce. Man oh man.

In other news, I just did an interview with the LA Times today about my new show “Cat Lady” which I premiere as a work in progress at the REDCAT when I get back to LA. It’s a departure rom my other work that tries to save the world all the time. It’s about… being a cat lady and cats. This is perhaps a bad sign when an artist starts doing work on their pets. But also it’s about pick up artists, cat psychics and loneliness.

“You mean this show will be all about your conquests and non-conquests Kristina Wong?”

No dummies. I am much more creative and interesting than that. Though it would be another great way I could cockblock mysel on stage. It’s about loneliness and human communication. But the great news is that one o my avorite reality tv stars is going to help me with part o the show. I just conirmed yesterday. I can’t wait. Let’s hope it goes well. I’ve never collaborated with a reality show star beore. I am not sure i he was reaked out at irst, but a little coaxing and I got him on my side.

Today I was doing some research on Pick Up Artists. And I was reading about this “Bait Reel Release” methodology they use. This idea that women are these ish and they chase the lure i it moves around. And I got excited because not only does it tie into some o the Animal Kingdom metaphors I’m trying to use, but it also gives me an excuse to learn to use a ishing rod and see i that will be a good analogy or using in the show.

So I went into the garage here and got out the ishing rod and started to pretend to ish in the Gul o Mexico. It was awul. The hook was going all o one oot rom the rod. I asked an older man to help me and the line got all tangled. So I am trying to learn how to ish online. These youtube videos are not very helpul.

I’m thinking maybe asking other ishermen on the island to help me ish will help me meet some ellas my age. There are quite a lot o guys here who ish. It’s so deceiving though because I’ll be in the cottage and see what looks like a hot guy ishing (because I can only see him rom behind) and then I’ll go down to the beach to take a closer look and the guy ends up actually being 12 or 80 rom the ront. Which just makes me eel ilthy. UCK!!!

Anyway, I can’t blog without use o all 26 letters o the alphabet. So it’s time to go. Why did that key have to go out? Why couldn’t it have been a Q or Z? I have no use or those.

Anyway, enjoy these pics o my handicrats.

I made a giant roach to leave behind here. It’s pretty cute. On the back side it looks like scales but it really spells out “Hermitage” in wide letters.

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Category: artist life., crafty, hot people, sex is unnecessary when you have yarn., the pick up artist, uck you, Vh1

Hocus Focus

May 7th, 2008

Yet another photo that will keep me single for a long time…

Well, I’ve been spit out of a busy week. I’m happy to be back in LA. Sad to hear about Myanmar. And fighting off headaches that I get when I think about the “Austrian Incest Dad” case. Blech. But Obama is looking up and I’ve just mounted a big poster of him on foam core for my kitchen.

This weekend was really nuts.

On Saturday, I was performing as Fannie and Officer Macgillawongster on the Xin Lu Bus Tour (Ming Ma’s Film Fest on wheels). The bus dropped us off at the DGA right when the Q&A for the sold out “Yours Truly, Miss Chinatown” documentary finished up.

Mind you, I have NOT seen the documentary yet. So there’s no stranger experience than showing up AFTER a documentary screening where several years of your life have been edited by someone else and viewed by the public before you’ve seen it. Sure, I LIVED what they saw. But I am not sure exactly sure WHAT they saw.

It was unreal. Strangers were coming up to me, all wide eyed, like they had known me forever saying things like…

“Thank you so much for your honesty.”

“Your story is incredible. Thank you.”

“It was a great balance to have you in there.”

“It’s so great… about that grant.” (You mean the one I got TWO years ago?)

And the kicker response.

“So… everything’s ok now right Kristina? You are doing ok?”

And I’m like freaking out screaming, “Honest? What do you mean HONEST?!! And what ‘story’ did you all see??! And of course I’m ok! I’m doing great!”

Even friends who had known me forever are coming up to me with this love in their eyes. Like suddenly I’ve become more human to them.

“Oh, Kristina. That was amazing… You came off really well in it.”

Why wouldn’t I have come off well?!?!!

I am still freaked out to watch it. But from what I’ve heard, I am already getting a picture of what “story” everyone saw in the doc. And I seem to be pretty fun to watch. My folks also are interviewed in it and are apparently very funny down to earth seeming. So I am not sure what kind of editing magic Daisy did, but….

What’s funny is that the current Miss Chinatown Court was there and instead of being all annoyed and confused by me as they have been in the past, they were all excited, “Oh hi!! Can we take a picture with you Kristina?!”

Ha! And one of the coordinators of the pageant who I’ve run into many time during my “crashings” gave me his card and we were on IM this morning and he sent me these pictures he took from after the screening. It was pretty funny. He was like, “Yeah, I remember the Chinese Chamber of Commerce were really upset with you.” And I was like, “Yeah, but now you guys love me!”

People have seen me and I haven’t met them or seen what they have seen of me.

It’s all so post modern.

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Category: art talk, artist life., Fannie Wong, hot people, i'm kristina wong, is unnecessary when you have yarn.


March 14th, 2008

Maybe my jokes will go over better when I am 86.

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Category: hot people

Holy Shit. x50

January 16th, 2008

I’m at the Lobby at the Standard now. There’s actually a casting call for Abercrombie male models by the pool but the models check in here. HOT. Nurit and I are trying to meet and talk about our big day, but in the meantime, I’m drooling and squealing with every piece of man meat man that walks in here. And because we are literally facing the casting guy and the models, some of them have been coming up to us asking, “Where do I sign in?”

“Why you can sign up in room 92, where I’m staying.”

We’ve been joking with the casting guy that we’re finning to get discovered.

It’s so unfair. Gorgeous people have it so easy. I should know. My life has been a breeze.

Anyway, I have a big day today. The show is today. Here are all the HOLY SHITS of my time in the last few days.






Wish me luck. I’m freaking freaking freaking out.

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Category: artist life., hollywood wong, hot people, miami